Author: Kristin
Theme challenge: Falling in love with a best friend
Things to include: “Fiesty, aren’t we?”, Where’s Waldo, ripped jeans
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Swearing
Author’s Notes: None

When Maggie Hagen was four, being in love wasn’t even a phrase in her vocabulary. It held no meaning for her. Of course, she loved her parents and her sister and brother and their dog, Ralph, but then again, at four, she loved her pink and purple Big Wheel and her array of My Little Pony’s, believing there was nothing better in the world. At four, her biggest worry was which toy she was going to play with and how to stop her brother from ruining her Barbie Dream House.

At age four, Maggie met Zac Hanson. The first day of summer her older brother, Adam, brought over his newest friend he’d made at his first day of swimming lessons, and that friend was Isaac Hanson, Zac’s older brother. Not wanting to be stuck at home with his other older brother, Taylor, who also found him annoying, a screaming and crying one year old and his parents, Zac begged and pleaded his brother to let him tag along. His parents had already readily agreed to let Zac go because it was one less child in the house, and Isaac fought them every step of the way, only to almost be grounded from going to the Hagen household.

Scowling, Isaac biked as quickly as he could to the Hagen’s house with no regard for his younger brother who was desperately trying to keep up, his little legs pedaling as fast they could. After arriving, the three boys wasted no time in wreaking havoc, especially on Maggie, and she flew out the door and down the front steps when she saw them running over the head of her Kid Sister doll with their bikes, laughing as they did so. Anger etched across her small features, Maggie stomped over to them to yank her doll off of the ground, yelling and her chubby pointer finger wagging at the three boys.

As punishment, knowing she didn’t have much control over her brother or Isaac, she grabbed Zac by the hand and forced him to play Barbies with her for the rest of the afternoon. That evening, as they trekked home, Isaac teased Zac endlessly about his new girlfriend, and in typical boy fashion, Zac whined and pouted the entire way, shouting that Maggie was not his girlfriend and that girls had cooties. And while he didn’t care for playing Barbies or Maggie’s bossy attitude, he returned the next day with Isaac, and as soon as he entered the Hagen house, Maggie whisked him off, confining them to the basement where all her toys were stored. This was the routine for the next few weeks before finally Maggie no longer had to force Zac to play with her, and he would freely seek her out as soon as he arrived at the Hagen’s.

In no time, they became regular fixtures at each other’s homes, soon declaring each other their best friend. Even as Isaac and Adam’s friendship fell apart in their teenage years as they made new friends upon entering high school, Zac and Maggie continued their friendship, spending nearly every day they could together, and when Zac and Maggie graduated from high school themselves, they followed one another to the same college, continuing the course of their friendship, knowing they could never be farther than ten minutes apart because surely, neither would be able to function and the world would end. The idea that they were best friends for life had been cemented in the early years of their life, and they believed that nothing could ever change that, that nothing could ever separate them. If only life were that naïve and innocent.

Zac’s interest in the opposite sex emerged at an early age. However, that interest, much to Maggie’s dismay in later years, was never focused on her. They’d never once explored that other side, the side that consisted of heated kisses, roaming hands, and racing hearts unless you counted those years of playing “doctor” as a child, exploring the forbidden. Maggie watched him date girl after girl through their high school and college years, not one relationship ever succeeding, but that’s not to say that they didn’t try. A few came close. She had been there through all the bruised and broken hearts, always wishing he’d give her a chance to have his heart, knowing she’d never abuse it the way other girls did.

She wasn’t sure where along the line of their friendship she had fallen for him. Of course, there had been days of wondering “what if” when it came to taking their friendship one step further, but she figured it was only natural to contemplate such things through her years of puberty when boys were no longer just glue-eating buffoons covered in mud, spending their days playing football or wrestling with one another. Or perhaps it was just because of the pure fact of how close they were and she told herself it was only natural to feel that way towards him with how much time they spent together. Most times, she would quickly write off her thoughts as her just being lonely and desperate and move on, ignoring her thoughts and feelings until they came back around again in one of her moments of desperation and weakness.

Through the years, she did her best in ignoring her feelings, distracting herself with other boys, but she couldn’t ignore the fact that some days her heart ached so bad from wishing Zac would fall in love with her, and as time went on and they grew older and she watched Zac with woman after woman, wishing she could be them, she finally faced the fact that she was, indeed, in love with Zac Hanson, best friend extraordinaire.

There were many listless days and drunken nights where she had almost just blurted it out, but every time, the repercussions and consequences were able to seep into her mind, stopping her before the words verbalized and escaped, potentially ruining their friendship. She wasn’t sure if he felt the same, and she couldn’t bare to take that chance. However, nineteen years later, and it had finally become too much for her to handle.

Thus, she left not too long after she graduated college, heading off to the West coast. She had told him she needed a change, to get away and experience something other than Tulsa, Oklahoma. In reality, she couldn’t do it anymore. She couldn’t continue to stand by as he dated girl after girl, waiting, wishing, and hoping for her chance. She couldn’t be the one to mend his bruised and broken hearts anymore. It hurt too much, and after nineteen years, she was finally tired of hurting.

Maggie was an analyzer. She analyzed every soft touch, every coy smile, every inflection of his voice, every word that was whispered to her, and no matter how hard she tried not to analyze it all, it didn’t work, and after nineteen years, she was just too tired of it. She was tired of the blood rushing through her veins, the hard pounding of her heart, and the flushing of her cheeks every time he touched her or smiled her way. She was tired of the hope it instilled in her when, really, it all seemed hopeless.

During her time away, they talked on the phone, but she always found a way to cut their conversations short, not being able to bare the hurting of her heart every time she heard his voice. In the three years she’d been gone, she’d only been home five times, one for each Christmas, once for her Memaw’s funeral, and the other for her sister’s wedding. Of those five times, she’d seen Zac twice, always making an excuse so she wouldn’t have to face him and the reality of her feelings for him. It was easier to distance herself and try to forget Zac and everything she felt for him. It was easier than feeling the painful clenching of her heart and stomach every time she heard his voice or saw his face, knowing he didn’t feel the same way she did. She supposed one could say she ran away, and really, she did. She figured the more distance she put between them physically, the easier it would be to distance herself from him emotionally, and though it was a lie, she told herself it was working well. She refused to stay in Tulsa, aching for Zac to love her. Instead, she did it from California.

Now, she was about to make her sixth trip home. The day she had received the invitation in the mail she swore her world had ended, crashing around her feet and shattering to pieces along with her heart.

She wasn’t oblivious to the fact that he had been dating someone, but she had figured it would only last a few months, just as all of his other relationships had. The moment she had dreaded all of her life had finally become a reality, and there was nothing she could do about it. She had missed her chance, and that thought alone made her sick to her stomach. Foolishly, she had let him slip away because she had been too scared to tell him how she felt, and she would live the rest of her life knowing the love of her life was never going to be hers.

And though they had never dated, she had always felt a sense of security in knowing he was never serious with a girl, meaning not engaged or married. At least then, she felt as though she still had a chance to be with him, that by some chance, some day, they would magically realize they felt the same. Now, it was official. He would never be hers; she would never have the chance to love him. She would have to spend the rest of her life watching him love a woman who wasn’t her and regretting the “what if” she’d never explored.

She spent the rest of the week in bed in her pajamas, sleeping the days away and crying the times she was awake. Every call went straight to the machine, and she was certain she’d lost seven pounds in just that short week from all of the crying, sleeping, and not eating. All the hard work she had done in the last three years to erase her feelings for him, to tuck them away, came undone in a matter of minutes. That following Monday, though, she dragged herself out of bed, dropped her RSVP for one in the mail, and went back to work, going on with life as though none of the past week had happened. It was amazing how well she had gotten at lying to herself and pretending her feelings for Zac never existed, and she continued on that path for the next three months before suddenly, she was on a plane to Tulsa.

Maggie arrived at the airport the Wednesday before the wedding. Her sister was the only person who knew what time her flight was scheduled to land, and so she was surprised to see Zac standing there, his wide eyes searching the crowd. His eyes widened even more and he smiled brightly and nervously once he had spotted her exiting the terminal.

Was this really happening? She blinked twice to make sure it was Zac who was really standing before her, a goofy grin gracing his face. Her palms were suddenly slick with sweat, and she felt warm even in her jeans and tank top. She wiped at her upper lip that was lined with a small sheen of sweat, and she slowly approached Zac, doing her best to stall as much as possible, but really, how long could she stall? It was too late now. She was not prepared for this. She had been foolish to think she could do this, to think she could face Zac. This was her test, and she was failing horribly. She suddenly realized she was not as good a liar as she thought she was.

“Oh my God,” he breathed, his arms wrapping around her small body immediately, his stubble scratching against her cheek as he did so and her arms hanging limply at her sides. “I can’t believe you’re actually here.”

“Wh-what are you doing here?” she stuttered out of fear and shock, which he mistook as pleasant disbelief provoked by his surprise appearance.

“Your sister told me. Granted, I had to pester it out of her. Why didn’t you tell me? I thought I was going to be the one to pick you up.”

She shrugged, her gaze following to the floor, as she tucked a strand of loose hair behind her ear. “I figured you’d be busy with wedding stuff.”

“I’m never too busy for you,” he smiled, throwing an arm around her and leading her towards baggage claim.

While Maggie’s mind reeled from the sudden face-to-face with Zac, he talked endlessly about wedding details, what was going on with the band’s music, and how glad he was to have her home the entire time from when they had grabbed her luggage to the time he dropped her off at her parents’ house. Through his rambling, he asked her questions about California, and she did her best to focus and managed to answer his questions half-heartedly, all while trying to control the mini panic attack she was experiencing.

Twenty minutes later and after promising Zac she’d come to his parents’ house the following evening to meet Taryn, the woman of his dreams, she walked up the front steps of her parents’ house. As soon as she entered through the front door, her sister pulled her aside, apologizing profusely and explaining how Zac had gotten the information out of her, truly afraid Maggie was going to pull her hair and kick her in the shins. Maggie waved it off with a flick of her hand; it was too late now to be pissed; the damage was already done. There was nothing she could do now but go through the motions as her heart broke and her stomach twisted in knots as she watched Zac marry someone that wasn’t her.

She spent the rest of the day with her parents and siblings, pretending to be interested in what they were saying and doing when in actuality, the events to come the next day were playing over and over in her mind and she couldn’t stop thinking about how gorgeous Zac looked. She hadn’t thought it was possible, but he looked even better than he had three years ago.

Maggie didn’t get any sleep that night as she tossed and turned in her bed through the late hours, trying to get comfortable and using every tactic she’d ever learned to make herself fall asleep. Yet, none of them worked. She threw up three times that night, twice more the next morning, and once in the afternoon, two hours before she was to go to the Hanson household.

In an attempt to take her mind off of having to meet Taryn, aka Meddling Whore, and twisting knots in her stomach, she had sprawled her body across the couch, watching a Project Runway marathon, and a ring of the doorbell was the only thing to get her off of the couch. She slowly dragged her feet to the front door, and as she opened it, she realized it felt heavier than she remembered. She was surprised to see a red-faced Zac on her parents’ doorstep, tracks of tears still noticeable on his ruddy cheeks.

“Zac…”

He interrupted her, grabbing her arm and pulling her out the door and towards his car. He merely gestured towards the passenger side door, and she got in. Wordlessly, he started the car, backing out of her driveway, and drove aimlessly for the next hour. Maggie never once said anything, waiting for him to talk first, and she simply watched as he silenced his phone every time it rang before finally chucking it out the rolled-down window.

They had since parked in the parking lot of the nearest Walmart when he finally spilled the reason for his sudden appearance on her parents’ doorstep and why he had wordlessly kidnapped her, cutting her off before she almost started to speak.

“She’s cheating on me.”

Maggie gasped, and before she could respond, he spoke again.

“With Isaac.”

Her jaw literally dropped, and despite it all, he almost laughed at her reaction.

“I was supposed to be at the studio until two, but I finished early. So I thought I’d go home and get in a quick shower before going over to my parents’ house. I noticed Ike’s car when I pulled in, but of course, thought nothing of it.” He paused, turning to look out the driver side window, shaking his head back and forth slowly. “I heard them before I even saw them, Mags.”

She watched his jaw clench tightly as a tear rolled down his cheek.

“God, I don’t even hardly remember what happened. They were both mumbling something about being sorry and never meaning to hurt me while they tried to cover themselves up. Fuck that shit. It’s all a bunch of bullshit. Of course, it’s going to fucking hurt me.”

Maggie just nodded, not sure of what to say, thinking it was better to not say anything at all.

“Fuck!” he yelled, gripping the steering wheel in his hands. ”Fuck! God,” he groaned. “I don’t even know what to say. All I can say is fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,” he chanted.

“So what’s going to happen?” she asked quietly.

“Jesus, Maggie, what do you think? The wedding is off. I told her to pack her shit and get the fuck out. Isaac is now sporting a broken nose and a black and blue eye and is no longer my brother as far as I’m concerned.”

“What about the apartment?”

“I’m selling it. I can’t live there after this. I just can’t. So I get to move back home with mommy and daddy for awhile. Yay for me,” he cheered sarcastically. “My life is falling apart,” he muttered.

The two spent the rest of the afternoon sitting in his car in the Walmart parking lot, watching cars come in and out. Neither spoke with the exception of the random “shit’s” and “fuck’s” spewing from Zac’s mouth, and Maggie’s phone vibrated constantly, her parents’ or the Hanson’s number flashing on the screen every time. After five hours, Zac drove her back to her parents’ house only to beg her to stay up with him for the rest of the night, knowing there was no way he could sleep. She agreed, and the two spent the night in the band’s studio. His family knew where he was as they had seen his car parked outside the studio, but they knew enough not to bother him, just glad that Maggie was with him.

Just as was the case in his car, not much was said between them, and as the sun came up, he begged and pleaded for her to stay in Tulsa longer than she planned, claiming he couldn’t handle being alone.

“Gee, thanks,” she remarked. “I’m glad that’s all I’m good for.”

“No, that’s not it,” he backtracked. “You know what I mean. I’ve hardly seen you since you moved. I miss my best friend. Please stay and spend time with me.”

She readily agreed, knowing there was no way she could say no to him, and thus, a five day stay turned into two weeks, in which she spent every day with Zac. Most of it was spent watching movies on his parents’ couch, going out to eat, or listening to Zac claim that he no longer believed in love, convinced that it was merely a delusion and basically, a crock of shit.

And through those two weeks, she realized again how much she enjoyed spending time with Zac and how much she did miss her best friend while she had been gone. Slowly but surely, things returned to normal, hidden feelings and all, and it was almost as if she hadn’t been gone for three years. They quickly picked up where they had left off, joking and teasing and cuddling as they had many years before. Maggie was a little surprised by how easy it had been for them to fall into their old routine, but he was her best friend for a reason, and the last three years had shown her that no matter how little they saw of each other, how little they talked, and how much she tried to distance herself from him, nothing would change that. While it disturbed her because of the feelings she felt for him, it also offered some comfort because Zac was her best friend, first and foremost, and always would be.

A rare occurrence had happened in the Hanson household nights later in which everyone but Zac was out for a family dinner and movie, and Zac and Maggie claimed the empty house all to themselves. The plan of the night was to relive the carefree days of their childhood, escaping the stress of adulthood, and well, reality, but as the night went on, reliving their childhood was proving more stressful than reality and adulthood for Maggie than she had imagined. Throwing the book to the floor, she let out a frustrated growl, eliciting an amused look from the boy next to her.

“Problems?”

“I think wanting to relive part of our childhood was a bad idea. I can’t find Waldo,” she pouted.

Zac huffed a laugh, throwing his arm around her and turning his gaze to the conniving book strewn on the living room floor. Shortly after her arrival, she had spotted Zoe’s Where’s Waldo? book sitting on the coffee table and thought it’d be fun to try it out, having it been years since she had done it.

“It’s just a book, babe. It’s okay,” he empathized, patting her knee gently.

“I could do it when I was a kid. Why can’t I do it as a grown woman? That’s just pathetic.”

Cocking his head to the side in thought, his face scrunched up as he nodded slightly in agreement. “That is pathetic.”

“You’re not supposed to agree with me,” she mumbled, placing her head on his shoulder. “It makes me feel inept.”

“Well, I really can’t argue against that point,” he teased, taking his right hand and sticking his finger inside the hole on the knee of her ripped jeans, caressing the bare, smooth skin underneath.

They sat quietly, both watching as he drew lazy circles and spirals on her bronzed skin, and she did her best to not gasp and shiver from his soft touch. It was driving her crazy, and she tried to keep herself from pushing his hand away from her, wanting him to stop but also wanting nothing more than for him to explore and caress other parts of her body.

“She wasn’t the one for me,” he suddenly whispered, pulling Maggie from her thoughts.

Blinking once, she just kept her head on his shoulder, waiting for him to continue and knew his eyes were still on the hand that continued to graze across her exposed skin.

“She was too high strung. I mean she threw a fit if the pillows on the couch weren’t in the right place. What the fuck was I thinking wanting to spend my life with someone like that? Shit like that would have driven me nuts.”

Maggie shrugged, twisting her hands in her lap. “You loved her,” she simply answered. “You put up with that kind of stuff when you love someone.”

“Yeah,” he nodded. “I did,” he paused. “But I don’t think I loved her like I thought I did. I think I thought she was something she wasn’t. I forced myself to pretend she wasn’t the way she was because I wanted her to be the one.”

“Why?”

This time it was Zac’s turn to shrug. “I don’t know,” he mumbled. “It’s stupid.”

“It’s not stupid,” she murmured, nudging her head into his neck. “Come on.”

“I just,” he stumbled. “I don’t know. I guess I just thought I’d never find anyone else. That nobody else would love me for me and only for what I do or that nobody would love me like I love them.”

“Well, she obviously didn’t love you like you loved her if she cheated on you.” Maggie’s eyes widened as soon as she realized what she said, letting it slip without thinking before speaking. “I’m sorry,” she blurted, lifting her head immediately to look at him.

“No, it’s okay. It’s the truth. Even I had thoughts of straying,” he admitted.

His last sentence caught her attention, but she decided not to question it any further because she didn’t want to know about the other women that had caught his eye, the women beautiful and great enough to make him think of cheating on his girlfriend of three years because she obviously wasn’t one of them. “There’s a difference between thinking and doing,” she contended.

“I suppose,” he nodded. “I can’t say though that had the opportunity presented itself, I wouldn’t have cheated. I guess that makes me no better.”

A small frown etched its way across her face. Zac was never the cheating type, but she guessed that just showed how wrong he was in thinking he loved Taryn.

“I’m sorry. This is depressing,” he whispered.

“No,” she murmured. “It’s okay. I know you’re upset about it all, and rightfully so.”

“I was, but I’ve been feeling better thanks to you,” he smiled softly. “Come on,” he urged, scooting to the edge of the couch and bending down to pick up the almost forgotten Where’s Waldo? book. “I’ll help you.”

“No,” she pouted.

Zac chuckled at the ridiculousness of how she was acting, pouting and whining like a little kid, as he sat back against the couch, his shoulder brushing hers. “Come on,” he said, opening the book. “Look. It’s Waldo stuck in some type of maze,” he spoke as if he was talking to a little child, encouraging her to take the bait.

Sighing, she scanned over the page, taking in the scene, and Zac watched as she scanned the page again, slowly this time so as not to miss an inch.

“Did you find him?” she asked softly, a childlike quality to her tone, resting her head on his shoulder.

Shaking his head at her antics and laughing softly, he nodded. “I did.”

“Geez, you’re fast,” she mumbled. “Can you give me a hint?”

“He’s wearing a hat and glasses,” he smirked.

She turned her head upward, sending a glare his way, and pinched the skin of his arm. “Funny,” she replied dryly.

“I thought so.”

“This one’s really difficult,” she mumbled. “I can’t find him. I give up.”

“What? No. Come on, you can do it.”

“No, this is making me feel really stupid.”

“Ok, he’s somewhere on the bottom half of the page,” Zac encouraged.

“Great. I need hints to even find him.”

Zac watched her with a soft smile on his face and then laughed as she sat up, leaning closer to the book to get a better look.

“I’m pathetic,” she muttered. “Ugh. Seriously. Where the fuck is Waldo?”

“I could give you another hint, but it’ll completely give it away,” he laughed.

“No. I’m going to find this fucker on my own,” she stated, determined, as she pulled the book from his hands and into her own lap.

The two sat in silence as she continued to scan the page, and then Zac smiled brightly as he saw the beginnings of a smile creep across her face, knowing what was coming next.

“I found him,” she stated softly but proudly, smiling as she turned to look at him. “Behind the Icarus wanna-be,” she pointed.

Zac nodded. “Yup. See. I told you you could do it. When are you going to learn to trust me?”

“I quit trusting you the day you convinced me I’d be fine if I stood on one end of the teeter totter while you sat on the other.”

“It was funny though, wasn’t it?”

“Oh yeah,” she snorted, closing the book and placing it on her lap. “Breaking my arm, scraping my face all to hell, and being grounded from seeing you for two weeks was hilarious,” she shot sarcastically.

“Yeah, the not seeing you part sucked.”

“Glad to know you cared about my well being,” she said with a roll of her eye as she tucked her legs underneath her and reached up to pull her hair into a pony tail. Her left wrist was met with resistance as Zac pulled it down to his side.

“Don’t put it up,” he said softly, keeping his hold on her wrist as he looked at her.

And there they were…the swarming butterflies and the fluttering heart…her attempts to rid herself of such reactions when it came to Zac crumbled in a matter of seconds. These were the moments she hated. These were the moments she’d left to escape.

Maggie nodded dumbly, releasing her hair from her other hand as she stared back at Zac. She watched as his gaze flickered over her face, tracing over her features, before he seemed to break from his trance and released her wrist from his grasp, grabbing the Where’s Waldo? book from her lap.

“Let’s do another one,” he suggested, gesturing towards the book in his hands.

“No,” she protested. “I’m done with Waldo.”

“Okay,” he chuckled, setting the book back on the coffee table. “What else would you like to do to continue reliving your childhood?”

“Slumber party? she suggested, her eyebrows rising in hope.

“You want to go to bed? You’re no fun.”

“I’m tired,” she yawned. “It’s been a long day. Plus, Waldo wore me out.”

“How can you even be tired? We didn’t do anything today. Pathetic.”

“Thank you,” she mumbled, dropping her head against the back of the couch and closing her eyes.

“I got an idea,” he announced, interrupting her attempt at a few minutes of peace.

“Hmm,” she hummed, too tired to actually speak and turning her head to look at him.

“Remember when we used to play Doctor?” he grinned, wiggling his eyebrows.

“I am not playing Doctor with you.”

“Oh come on, it’s not like we haven’t seen it all before.”

“That was back when we had nothing to see and before we realized our bits were for more than peeing.”

“Don’t you want to see what you’ve been missing out on all these years?”

“Stop it. You’re grossing me out.”

“I’ll just have to get you drunk,” he teased.

“Ah, that’s right. I forgot; that’s the only way you can get any play. By taking advantage of intoxicated girls.”

“You would know,” he countered.

“Ha, right. I can proudly say that I was never subjected to a drunken Zac trying to grope me and get me to make out with him.”

“Well, that’s just too bad. We’ll have to change that. How about tonight?” he grinned, wiggling his eyebrows again.

“Is that supposed to turn me on somehow?” she questioned, referencing his dancing eyebrows. “And how about no? I don’t feel like having to pretend that I’m enjoying what you’re doing to me and then faking an orgasm.”

“Ouch,” he groaned, grabbing at his heart. “Way to kick a broken man when he’s down.”

“It’s my specialty,” she grinned.

Maggie knew she was probably being a little harsh in her joking, but it was an odd thing. While she wanted Zac to know how she felt about him, she didn’t. If she thought he even had a clue of her feelings for him, she made sure to act in a way that would negate his assumptions. She would go out of her way to prove to him she didn’t like him, so deeply convinced that he didn’t feel the same about her and never would. Even she didn’t understand the schizophrenia of it all.

“Well, what do you say to popcorn and a movie?”

She nodded. “Sounds good, but I can’t guarantee that I’ll stay awake for the entire thing.”

“Fine by me,” he responded, pushing himself off of the couch before holding out his hand to pull her to her feet.

He kept her small hand wrapped in his strong and comforting grasp as he led the way to the dark kitchen only lit by a night light plugged in near the stove, Maggie dragging her feet behind him. Laughing, Zac shoved her towards the fridge, instructing her to get some drinks, as he retrieved a bag of popcorn from the cupboard. Placing the bottles of water on the counter, she grabbed a bowl, listening as Zac hummed, setting the timer on the microwave. Turning around, he approached her from behind, his hands taking advantage of the fact that her tank top had ridden up as she reached for a bowl, tickling the exposed skin of her stomach.

“Stop it,” she squealed, swatting at his hands as she laughed, lowering back to her feet and turning around to face him.

“I can’t help it. You’re so hot,” he grinned, his voice low, as his eyes roamed over her body and he placed a hand on either side of her, pinning her between his broad body and the counter.

“Feisty, aren’t we?”

He simply smirked, raising an eyebrow, and nodded in response.

“You need to get laid,” she finally retorted as she placed the bowl between them, trying to create space between their bodies.

“Care to volunteer?” he asked, taking the bowl from her hands and setting it on the counter behind her. “You won’t have to fake an orgasm. I promise.”

“Stop it, you dork,” she said, rolling her eyes playfully and pushing him away from her to give her enough space to escape. Her cheeks were warm, and she could feel the heat radiating from his body, making her knees weak and it all too much for her to handle. He smelled like boy and comfort, a dangerous combination, and it took all the will power she had not to crumble to pieces and curl up into his body and warmth, begging and pleading for him to just kiss her the way she wanted him to - with a hint of passion, a taste of promise, and a flavor of comfort.

“Awww, Mags, you’re blushing,” he teased, reaching for her arm as she attempted to walk past him and pulling her back into his embrace.

“Stoooop,” she groaned as he squeezed her body to his, shoving her face into his shoulder.

“Shut up. You love this,” he grinned.

“Think what you will.”

The two stood in silence as Zac rocked them back and forth, holding her tightly.

“I’ve missed you, you know” he confessed softly, breaking the silence.

“I know. Me too,” she whispered into his neck, her soft breath warming his skin.

“Tell me again why you moved to California.”

“Because I have a good job there.”

“But I miss this. That should be enough for you.”

“Well, then, you move to California.”

“I asked you first.”

“Not really. You could come to visit, you know,” she teased.

“I do!” he urged. “You always claim to be busy when we’re in California.”

She swallowed hard. “Because I am.”

“You should be able to make time for your best friend. You hardly even come home anymore,” he pouted.

Even though Maggie knew he wasn’t trying to upset her, his words hurt. She knew her body was ready to go into defense mode, and she did her best to bite her tongue from replying in frustration. She hadn’t come over to fight with him, and if they did fight, she was afraid her true feelings would bubble to the surface, spewing out in frustration before she would have the chance to stop them. And once they were said, she couldn’t take them back.

“Yes, I am a pathetic excuse for a best friend. I know. I’ve come to terms with that.”

“No,” he chuckled. “You’re not. I understand. I, out of all people, should understand. It just sucks having you so far away.”

“I know,” she whispered.

“I do miss cuddling with you on the couch and watching movies or hugging you whenever I feel like it,” he murmured into her hair, sending chills through her body.

“Yeah,” she breathed, feeling his hands smooth up and down her back in a comforting motion.

“Don’t you miss cuddling me?” he teased, swaying her in his arms.

“Shut up,” she grumbled, and just from the tone of her voice, Zac knew a pout was etched across her face.

He chuckled, and pulling away slightly, he cupped her face in his hands and drooped forward to place a kiss on her forehead. He let his soft lips linger and then pulled back, smiling down at her as his eyes roamed over her.

“Your hair is getting long again,” he murmured, running his hands through her waves.

“So is yours,” she smirked, tugging on the hands of his shag.

Reaching up to rub his head, he pouted and whimpered an “ouch”.

“Baby,” she taunted.

“Kiss it and make it better,” he demanded, sticking his mass of hair in her face, tickling her nose.

“No,” she giggled, pushing his head away from her face. “That’s your job.”

He laughed heartily, memories flooding his mind. “I remember those times when you’d come running to me when you got hurt and make me kiss it to make it better. I miss those times.”

“You miss kissing my disgusting scrapes?” she questioned, wrinkling her nose.

“No,” he laughed, squeezing her in his arms. “I miss when you’d come to me to make things better, when you depended on me to make you feel better and feel safe.”

“I still depend on you to do those things.”

“No,” he said quietly with a shake of his head. “You’re too far away for me to do that now. That’s what hurts the most some days, knowing I’m not the one that’s there to hold you when you’re having a bad day or an end-of-the-world crisis.”

“You haven’t been replaced if that’s what you’re thinking.”

“How do I know that?” he questioned, hurt evident in his voice, as he pulled away. “We never talk anymore. We hardly see each other. I don’t know anything anymore.”

“Zac,” she stated softly, watching him with sad eyes and placing a gentle hand on his arm as he turned away from her. “You’ll always be my best friend. You always have been, and nothing will ever change that.”

“I know you like California, but did you really have to go all the way there to find happiness?” he turned to her, searching her eyes with wide ones. “Why isn’t Tulsa enough? Why am I not enough?”

She considered her decision to leave Tulsa a selfish one, and she had always known he felt the same way, though he had never voiced it until now. She wanted to tell him that her move to California had nothing to do with him, but in reality, it had everything to do with him.

“We’ve been over this, Zac,” she reminded. “I needed to get out of here. There’s more to life than Tulsa.”

“Tulsa is me, Mags, and when you left Tulsa, I felt like you were leaving me,” he stated quietly, wrapping his arms around her once again.

“You know that’s not true,” she lied, looking up at him in the darkness.

“Do I?” he challenged gently.

She’ll never know what came over her that night in that moment, but she swallowed hard as Zac’s hands roamed her back in a soothing motion as he stared down at her, hurt and surprisingly, remorse in his eyes. And the way he was touching her, caressing her skin so softly that she lost all sense of logic and rationale. And then his hands were cupping the sides of her face, his thumbs rubbing across the flushed and warm apples of her cheeks.

The pounding heart, the blood rushing through her veins, the flushing of her cheeks…it had all returned, and this was her opportunity to stop it once and for all. Once he told her he didn’t feel the same, she could fully and truly move on, knowing the truth. She’d have no other choice because she couldn’t make him love her and she refused to spend the rest of her life suffering from unrequited love.

But maybe, just maybe…

“Zac,” she breathed.

“Hmm,” he hummed in response, brushing her hair out of her eyes, following the trail of his hand.

“I need you to kiss something and make it better,” she whispered so quietly he almost didn’t hear it.

She watched his eyes lower and meet hers in the darkness, and she shivered as they glistened with a sudden seriousness and a look she’d never seen before behind them.

“Yeah?” he breathed.

She nodded, reaching down to grasp his hand and bringing it to rest on her breast, over her heart, as she placed her hand over his, and her breathing increased just from the proximity of his hand and her sudden courage.

“Your boob hurts?” he whispered, missing the absurdity of his question, too caught up by the look in her eyes.

“No,” she laughed softly, a small smile gracing her face and crinkling the corners of her eyes. “No. I have a broken heart.”

“Oh,” he whispered, his gaze dropping to their hands. “Who broke it?”

“Just a boy,” she murmured.

“What’d he do?”

She was silent for a moment, her gaze shifting to her feet and back up to his eyes, before she spoke. “He doesn’t love me like I love him.”

“No?”

“No,” she breathed, shaking her head slightly, watching him.

His hand slipped out from under hers, reaching down to grip her hip, and she watched his head dip low. Her breathing was harsh as she tried to suck in enough air for her constricting lungs, and her chest was heaving with weighted breaths as his lips finally kissed over her heart, his lips caressing a sliver of smooth skin exposed by her low tank top. His lips stilled, his shallow breath warming her skin, and soon they moved an inch higher, kissing nothing but exposed skin below her shoulder. His other hand came to rest on the small of her back, pulling her closer, and she reached up to grip his shoulders, biting her bottom lip, as his lips ghosted over her collarbone, not kissing, simply gliding. Her head dropped back, offering him more smooth skin, as his lips lingered over her neck, his warm breath causing her to shiver.

“Does anything else hurt?” he whispered across her skin, his voice low and husky.

She swallowed hard and nodded slightly, pointing to the side of her neck. “Here,” she murmured, and Zac placed a searing kiss to her skin, kissing a trail to below her ear where he sucked lightly as she sucked in a breath of air.

“And here,” she breathed, touching her cheek.

He kissed her cheek, nudged his nose against hers gently as he moved his head to the other side to kiss her other cheek, and then kissed the tip of her nose. Pulling away, he lowered his head slightly, and his lips finally hovered above her own.

“Anywhere else?” he whispered with heavy-lidded eyes as he watched her, his lips brushing against hers as he spoke.

She whimpered softly before breathing a “yes”.

“Here?” he questioned, bringing a few of his fingers to rest on her mouth.

She nodded, raising her eyes to meet his gaze, and she stood completely still, her heart beating so hard in her chest she thought it would burst right through it. “Yeah,” he nodded in return, distracted, as his fingers caressed her bottom lip. “Yeah,” he echoed again.

His eyes followed the path of his fingers as they trailed down her neck and between the valley of her breasts before they came to rest on her hip as he pulled her body closer. His gaze fluttered from her mouth to her eyes and back to her mouth. “Despite what you think, I do love you like you love me,” he whispered before his lips captured hers in a soft kiss, her gasps her only response. “I have for quite some time,” he breathed against her mouth before kissing her again, coaxing her supple lips to move with his.

Her eyes widened in surprise before they fluttered close as his lips nibbled at hers, and she returned the kiss just in time before he moved away, concerned that she wasn’t responding at first, welcoming the feel of his lips upon hers and his body pressed against hers.

Tears welled behind her closed eyes as she realized just exactly what was happening. The boy she had loved since before she even knew what love was had admitted he loved her too and had her wrapped in his arms, kissing her in a way that was better than she had ever imagined, and she had to pull away from Zac’s lips because suddenly she had forgotten how to breathe.

“I thought you didn’t believe in love anymore,” she gasped against his lips.

“You’re the exception. You’ve always been the exception.” He paused a moment, brushing his lips against hers. “Ever since you first fell off your bike when you were four years old and came crying to me to kiss it to make it better, God, I knew. I knew I wanted you to be mine. I wanted to be the one to always kiss it and make it better.”

Maggie sucked in a breath, her heart clenching in a good way, and she choked on a small sob that was stuck in her throat, closing her eyes and a few tears escaping and streaming their way down her face.

“I’ve just been waiting for you to tell me that you wanted me to be that person too,” he admitted softly. “Truthfully, the day I found Taryn and Isaac, I’d never been happier to have been cheated on. They prevented me from making the biggest mistake of my life. She was only a replacement for you, to help me get over you because I never thought you’d feel the same way.”

“You picked her to replace me?” she whispered, smiling softly.

“I know,” he laughed. “But when you left for California, it damn near killed me. I was desperate.”

A steady stream of tears slipped from her eyes upon hearing his words, and Zac brushed his thumbs across her cheeks, rubbing the salty wetness into her skin.

“I’ve always known I love you. I’ve always just been so scared to tell you, and when you left, I realized how stupid I’d been not to tell you.”

“I know,” she whispered, interrupting him. “God, I know,” she repeated.

“And then Taryn happened, and I was just in too deep. Having to send you that invitation in the mail was the worst day of my life, and God, when I saw you at the airport, I couldn’t breathe,” he whispered, cupping her face in his hands, her hands reaching up to grip his. “I knew I had to make a choice; I knew I had to tell you how I felt all these years, and Taryn cheating made it that much easier for me to tell her that the wedding was off.”

Maggie let a sob escape this time and tightened her grip on his hands, squeezing them once, and he smiled tenderly, tears welling in his own eyes.

“You sent my world into a tailspin the moment you dragged me away to play Barbies with you, and in the words of Chris Cabarra, my heart is yours to fill or burst, to break or bury, or wear as jewelry, whichever you prefer,” he spoke, reciting one of her favorite Dashboard Confessional songs and cracking a small smile.

Rolling her eyes, she gave him a slight shove as she wiped at her eyes, laughing lightly. “That was so corny. Oh my God.”

“I’m serious,’ he said, his voice low, grabbing her gently. “It’s yours. For as long as you want it.”

“Well, then,” she breathed, looking up at him. “I’ll take it.”

“Yeah?” he smiled, leaning down to brush his nose against hers before kissing her softly.

“Yeah,” she echoed, pressing her lips to his.

She wasted no time in responding this time, smoothing her hands up the front of his chest and looping them around his neck, pulling him closer to her. His full lips brushed against hers gently, teasing her, before they crashed against hers, slowly increasing the pressure, and their lips moved together, learning every crevice and bump, as his hands roamed over her sides. She gasped when she felt his tongue caress her bottom lip, and her bottom lip trembled slightly as she opened her mouth for him, unable to keep back a moan which only seemed to fuel Zac further as he grabbed a handful of her long hair, fisting it in his grasp.

Walking her backwards, he pushed her up against the counter, one hand gripping it and the other gripping her hip. She sucked on his bottom lip, and groaning low in his throat, he pressed the weight of his body into hers. “God, Mags,” he whispered before pressing his lips against hers again, his hands slipping under the thin material of her tank top to caress the soft skin of her stomach.

She moaned into his mouth, gripping the soft material of his shirt in her hands. It was almost too much for her - his lips on hers, his hands gliding over her body, his ragged and uneven breathing - but she wanted it to last forever. He tore his lips from hers, his mouth trailing over her jaw line and down her neck to her collarbone where he bit her lightly. Maggie’s hands dove into his hair, tugging on the ends, as his smooth lips attacked the soft skin of her neck, and she sighed a whimper when she felt his tongue swipe across her heated skin.

Placing his hands on the small of her back, Zac pulled her body forward, pressing her small body into his even though he was already pressed up against her, and his lips kissed a trail back to her awaiting and open mouth that was desperately trying to suck down air, her lungs fighting to take in as much air as they could. A moan rumbled from the back of his throat, the sound muffled by her mouth on his, as she licked at his bottom lip and her hands slipped under the hem of his t-shirt, caressing the bronzed skin of his back just above his sweatpants. A few of his fingers dipped below the waistband of the back of her jeans, stroking the smooth skin, and she gasped, biting down on his bottom lip causing him to push his hips into hers.

“God,” she breathed against his mouth, her hands coming around to the front of his jeans, playing with the button and her tongue licking at his bottom lip, soothing her bite from earlier and sending a shudder through his body.

“I know,” he chuckled, breathlessly, breaking their kiss and putting an end to their heated make-out session. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that,” he smiled, resting his forehead against hers.

“What? Practically molest me in your kitchen?” she teased, her chest heaving as she tried to even her breathing.

“Yeah,” he laughed softly.

“Well, you have no idea how long I’ve been waiting for you to do that.”

“Ever since Ryan’s party in 4th grade where you came crying to me when Josh tried to kiss you, sticking his tongue down your throat, and you thought he was trying to suffocate you to death,” he smirked, winking at her.

“You fucker,” she laughed, pushing him away from her. “I’m never going to live that down, am I?”

“Nope,” he grinned.

Shaking her head and rolling her eyes, she walked over to the microwave. “I think it’s safe to say the popcorn is done,” she laughed, pulling the bag out and ripping it open.

She walked back to where he stood near the counter, still calming himself, and handed him the bag to dump into a bowl as she picked up the temporarily forgotten drinks, heading towards the living room.

“Soooooo,” he started, turning to look at her with a hopeful expression on his face as he made his way to where she stood in the entry way waiting for him. “Do you want to play Doctor now?” he grinned.